SkyMall Monday: Towel-Matic

I love to cook. Whether it's pizza, hot dogs or well-seasoned steaks, I kick up quite a storm in the SkyMall Monday kitchen. But you can't even begin to imagine the mess that I make. Most of my kitchen adventures result in me being covered in mayonnaise and bleeding profusely. With my hands full of salamis and Rocky Mountain oysters, I have a hard time tearing off sheets of paper towel. The roll ends up coming undone and that breaks my heart. There is nothing more devastating than a paper towel roll unfurled. That's why SkyMall Monday is so pleased to add the Towel-Matic to the kitchen arsenal!

Thank heavens there is now a device that automatically dispenses paper towels for you! With just a wave of your hand in front of the sensor, the Towel-Matic will present you with one or two sheets. In fact, it can even dispense a half-sheet if you're one of those people that buys rolls with half-sheet perforations because you're that anal-retentive about paper towel comsumption.

Why would you need to spend $60 on a device that dispenses paper towel for you? I'm offended by your question but my editors require that I answer it. So, I'll lean on my dear friends at the SkyMall catalog to explain it:

It never unravels. Built-in optical sensor automatically identifies the perforations on the towel and stops right at the line every time. One-handed operation guarantees perfect tearing and helps prevent the spread of germs.

It identifies perforations! Now you won't waste valuable nanoseconds of your life finding the perforations on the paper towel with your own eyes.

Think how much easier your life will be now that you don't have to worry about your paper towel roll looking mildly unsightly. Today is the first day of the rest of your life and you can be certain that you can wipe all that mayonnaise off your forehead.

Filed under: Gear