Nov 16th, 2009 at 1:00PM: I lost my meat today. It's gone. Don't mourn its loss. No, this is no time for sorrow. When a man's meat is pilfered by a no-good poacher, well, that there's a time for revenge. Time spent cryin' is time spent dyin'. That's what my grandpappy used to say. He was shot in the head while cryin'. Damn shame. But back to my meat. I reckon my neighbor done gone and pilfered it. I can't be having meat ...Click on a label to read posts from that part of the world.
skymall-monday posts
SkyMall Monday: Branding Irons
Nov 16th, 2009 at 1:00PM: I lost my meat today. It's gone. Don't mourn its loss. No, this is no time for sorrow. When a man's meat is pilfered by a no-good poacher, well, that there's a time for revenge. Time spent cryin' is time spent dyin'. That's what my grandpappy used to say. He was shot in the head while cryin'. Damn shame. But back to my meat. I reckon my neighbor done gone and pilfered it. I can't be having meat ...SkyMall Monday: Wild Lawn Ornaments
Nov 9th, 2009 at 1:00PM: I keep myself safely secluded in the SkyMall Monday headquarters. It's built inside a mountain, under several hundred feet of granite, in a secure and secret location. This protects me from the fearsome animals that I now assume rule the Earth. While I fear all wildlife and assume that they are out to get me (and/or my Lucky Charms), I do enjoy their decorative properties. But how can I take ...SkyMall Monday: Underwater Cell Phone System
Nov 2nd, 2009 at 1:00PM: Here at the SkyMall Monday headquarters, the motto is "Be Prepared...Always" I considered copying the Boy Scouts' motto verbatim, but I just can't support any organization that places so much emphasis on neckerchiefs. That said, I like to be ready for any situation, and thankfully the SkyMall catalog anticipates every situation imaginable (and some that only a person on a tremendous amount of ...SkyMall Monday: Solafeet Foot Tanner
Oct 26th, 2009 at 6:00AM: This week, as promised, I'm featuring the best new product in the Holiday 2009 SkyMall catalog. And it couldn't come at a better time. This may shock you, but being America's leading SkyMall expert doesn't pay very well. So, I've applied for a lot of jobs to supplement my income. My resumé is impressive. I interview well. But at the end of the process, I always get turned down. And my ...SkyMall Monday: Reader Favorite
Oct 19th, 2009 at 1:00PM: Kia ora from New Zealand. I'm in the Southern Hemisphere for the fourth time this year since Spring is better than Fall and I wanted to miss the first sign of snow in New York City. I also wanted to take a long trip to maximize my time with the new SkyMall catalog (more on that later). While I may be away, I have been monitoring last week's SkyMall Monday reader poll very closely. I was flattered, ...SkyMall Monday: Anniversary Gift Card Giveaway
Oct 12th, 2009 at 1:00PM: Get the champagne on ice, don your finest party hat and put out a cheese plate, because today we are celebrating the ONE-YEAR ANNIVERSARY OF SKYMALL MONDAY! On October 13, 2008, Gadling charged me with delivering to you, our dear readers, one SkyMall product review per week. Did I want that responsibility? Yes. Do I enjoy doing it? Of course. Should I be celebrated for it? Absolutely. But you know ...SkyMall Monday: Travel Writer Favorites
Oct 5th, 2009 at 1:00PM:
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October is a very special month for SkyMall Monday (and not just because Halloween makes this thing more appropriate). You see, come October 13, this li'l ol' feature will be exactly one-year old! That means it's finally eating solid foods, sporting a luxurious head of ...SkyMall Monday: Travel Bidet
Sep 28th, 2009 at 1:00PM:
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Everyone experiences lulls at their job. Work is not always as rewarding as we want it to be. But, from time to time, something happens that reinvigorates us. Something that energizes and excites us about what we do for a living and makes us proud again. I'm experiencing such a ...SkyMall Monday: Portable Microwave
Sep 21st, 2009 at 1:00PM: When I'm toiling away in the SkyMall Monday headquarters, I tend to cook a lot. From burritos to tacos to quesadillas, I enjoy preparing a wide array of ethnic foods. But when I travel, I often crave those tastes of home. Unfortunately, cooking on the road can pose a real challenge. At home I have all of my gadgets, like a freezer to hold my Hot Pockets and microwave to heat up said pockets to the ...SkyMall Monday: Powerlung
Sep 14th, 2009 at 1:00PM: I am not what many would call fit. Sure, I look thin enough. I go hiking and kayaking and, on occasion, I even drink juice. I do leave the SkyMall Monday headquarters from time to time to burn a calorie or two. But I also sweat when I get out of bed. I get winded taking the elevator. And I like my ham wrapped in bacon. In other words, I'm your typical American. So, I recently decided that I need ...SkyMall Monday: Hidden Litter Box
Sep 7th, 2009 at 1:00PM: It's confession time: I hate cats. Well, hate is a strong word. I just don't understand cats. They seem completely ambivalent about my presence, selfish and they pee indoors. Dogs go outside like civilized animals. Cats defecate indoors in a box. That's simply not natural. I can't have the SkyMall Monday headquarters smelling like feline pee and poop. But, I understand that some people are lonely, ...SkyMall Monday Classic: Wineglass Holder Necklace
Aug 31st, 2009 at 1:00PM: In honor of Gadling's celebration of all things wine, we're re-posting a classic SkyMall Monday that originally ran on May 25, 2009. There are other wine-related products on SkyMall, but none deserve the appreciation that this one merits. It also happens to be one of my favorite SkyMall products of all-time. Enjoy and cheers! I like to drink. There's nothing wrong with that. Many of us enjoy a ...SkyMall Monday: Beer Pager
Aug 24th, 2009 at 1:00PM: When I was in high school in the mid-90s, beepers were all the rage. My mother, being the prudent parent that she was, forbid me from having one. While I was devastated, it probably would not have improved my social life that much as no one would have paged me. But I digress. Pagers have fallen on hard times since then. Cellphones reign supreme and beepers have been relegated to the dregs of ...SkyMall Monday: Digital Nightvision Scope
Aug 17th, 2009 at 1:00PM: Outside of the SkyMall Monday Headquarters, I've seen some epically beautifully things. Soaring mountains, raging waterfalls and rolling meadows that stretched towards what seemed like an infinite horizon. Yep, the world is a beautiful place. But, sometimes that beauty is hiding. Sometimes, that beauty tries to evade you. Sometimes, you have to hunt for that beauty. You see, from time to time, the ...SkyMall Monday: Walk-O-Long
Aug 10th, 2009 at 1:00PM: Shockingly, I do not have any children...that I know of. Sure, they're cute and cuddly and can fetch you a beer when you don't want to step away from the television. But, in these modern times, they're also coddled, spoiled and, quite frankly, a tad too cocky. Now that they can control their own nosebleeds and traverse even the most demanding terrains, there's just no stopping their egos from ...SkyMall Monday: Leather Driving Gloves
Aug 3rd, 2009 at 1:00PM: I love a good road trip. There's nothing better than leaving the SkyMall Monday headquarters and exploring this great country of ours. But the rigors of a long car ride can often be too much for a man to handle. I'm not talking about my legs getting stiff or all the fast food I eat at rest stops. No, it's the blisters. When I drive, it's a white knuckle adventure and it wears out my silky smooth, ...SkyMall Monday: Fernando the Chihuahua
Jul 27th, 2009 at 1:00PM: I'll always remember where I was when I heard the news. I think we all will. I was in the SkyMall Monday headquarters. There was a "Breaking News Alert" on CNN. I looked up from my giant magnifier and realized that the world would never be the same. In that moment, I knew how my parents must have felt when President Kennedy was killed. My heart sank. I struggled to swallow. My eyes welled up as I ...SkyMall Monday: Genuine Turkish Wrap
Jul 20th, 2009 at 1:00PM: I love the beach (yes, I do leave the SkyMall Monday headquarters from time to time). When I'm not admiring my Alien Gnome Bandits or towing my nieces in a shoe-shaped raft, you can find me relaxing on the beach with a good book, some sweet tunes and the tiniest bathing suit I can find [Note: I have photos of me in said bathing suit, but Gadling's editors threatened me with great bodily harm if I ...SkyMall Monday: Electronic Feng Shui Compass
Jul 13th, 2009 at 1:00PM: The SkyMall Monday headquarters is a pretty chaotic place. I'm constantly testing products, rotating hot dogs and pulling children around. But, despite all the schlock that's littering my workspace, it's still a calm, soothing and spiritual place. How do I manage to keep things so full of positive qi? Well, with feng shui, of course. Sadly, though, it's not easy to keep things harmonious when it's ...SkyMall Monday: Looking Good Edition
Jul 6th, 2009 at 1:00PM:
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Summer is here, and we're looking to get out of the SkyMall Monday headquarters to enjoy some sun, sand and surf. But, well, as I've discussed in this space before, I'm not exactly winning a hot body contest anytime soon. Thankfully, our favorite ...
