For more than a thousand years, Noyon, France, has been the center of Europe's cherry and black currant trade. To honor that sweet tradition, on the first Sunday of each July, the fruity city stages a massive Red Fruit Fair, during which local fruit farmers bring their ruddy crops to the village so people can pick over, inspect, and sample some of nature's juiciest treasures.
With crowds expected to top 20,000, this is the place to go if you're into cherries, black currants, strawberries, red currants, loganberries, or raspberries. Orange-lovers are NOT welcome. And for the love of God, don't ask where they keep the bananas. That would be the pits.
* July 5-8: The Amazing Roswell UFO Festival
I visited the dusty, little outpost of Roswell, New Mexico a few years back and had an out-of-this-world experience. This July, both the faithful and the suspicious will gather at the Roswell UFO Festival to celebrate the 60th anniversary of the Roswell Incident, when a UFO was said to have crashed into nearby military grounds.
Featuring experts, authors, researchers, and lecturers dissecting the infamous incident, the celebration will also sport an alien parade, an alien costume contest, and an alien hot air balloon ride. I'm sure they'll also be rustling up support (and contributions) for the Alien Apex Resort. If you're lucky, you may get probed.
* July 5: The Running of the Nudes
In an effort to spread the message about the cruelty of Pamplona's legendary Running of the Bulls, some clever (and no doubt horny) PETA-people got together and organized the Running of the Nudes. During the Running of the Nudes -- held just days prior to the Running of the Bulls -- thousands of gangly, nekkid protesters pour onto the streets of Pamplona, arms flailing, butt-cheeks jiggling, and knocked-knees akimbo for the 6th Annual Running of the Nudes. All in the name of protesting animal cruelty. No bull.
Not surprisingly, the clips on YouTube show very little running...and very few nudes. Nevertheless, the event attracts worldwide media attention and is sure to be a fun, festive, and freeing way to spend the day. Our advice: pack shoes (not leather ones!) and sunscreen. And be on the lookout for sharp fences.
* July 6-14: Encierro, (The Running of the Bulls)
When the Running of the Nudes is finished, Pamplona's bulls are ready to burst from their pens. Staged each morning at 8 am, an individual Running consists largely of young men (although women participate, too) who run in front of the bulls to lead them from their pens into the bull ring. If you're looking for a festival where you can see something uncommon AND get some good cardio, this is the one. See this guy? His heart's racing.
The course is only about half a mile long, so when you consider the run usually lasts only 2-3 minutes, you can be sure the sleepy-headed or hung over are probably cheering from the safety of their balconies. Begun in the 1850s, the event has evolved to incorporate new traditions, all of which sound fun -- and infinitely safer. Interested? Read the rules before booking your ticket.
* July 6-8: World Wife Carrying Championships
Seemingly less brutal than the Running of the Bulls, the World Wife Carrying Championships could potentially be far more injurious -- depending on how angry your wife will be if you (a) drop her on her head or (b) lose. Currently, 41 couples are registered to participate in this grueling event, that dates to the late-1800s.
The current record-holders are Margo Uusorg and Birgit Ulricht from Estonia; it took them only 55.5 seconds to travel the length of the sand, grass, and gravel track, which is 253.5 meters long. If you want to build your relationship with your spouse, signing up may be a wise move. After all, Finns believe that wife carrying is both "good for your relationship" and erotic. From the images I've seen, however, I'm not convinced.
* July 7: Mountain Bike Bog Snorkeling
Mountain Bike Bog Snorkeling takes place the first weekend of every July. Staged in the pretty-much-unpronounce-able Waen Rhydd bog on the outskirts of the even-more-unpronounce-able Llanwrtyd Wells, organizers cut a trench in the bog approximately 6 feet deep and 45 yards long. During the event, participants cycle two lengths of the bog underwater using snorkels while riding mountain bikes that have tires filled with lead and water. Racers must supply their own snorkel. Wet-suits are recommended but are not required. The James Bond look is preferred. Gagging on bogwater is laughed at. I think you get the idea.
Before you dismiss this activity, mind ye that the lasses are lining up to participate: “It's cold, yes, when you get in, but it's good for your skin.” Never mind that you stink.
* July 7: Summer Redneck Games
The first weekend of each July, the Summer Redneck Games are staged at Buckeye Park in East Dublin, Georgia. This year marks the 12th anniversary of the event, which'll feature plenty of funnel cakes and other good fair food, as well as games like the Butt Crack Competition, the Hubcap Hurl, the Mud Pit Belly Flop, Redneck Horseshoes (they use toilet seats), Seed Spittin,’ and an Armpit Serenade (they use, um, armpits). There's also a Bobbin’ for Pig Feet event, which is at once amusing and sad -- since pig's feet don't float. Don't believe me? Check out the video from last year's event.
Given that the event is sponsored by a radio station, it should come as no surprise that there'll be plenty of music to entertain you and the 20,000 other attendees expected to show up. No word on whether Slayer will be making it this year.
* July 22: Beer Can Regata
For the past 31 years, the Combined Lions Clubs of Darwin have been promoting the annual Beer Can Regatta on Darwin's famous Mindil Beach.
Begun as an unusual by-product of the devastation caused to the Australian city by “Cyclone Tracy” in 1974, the Regatta resulted from locals having (a) too many beer cans; (b) too much free time; and (c) no recycling program. Said one drunk Aussie to another: "Why not stage a beer can race?" And so it went.
Amazingly, when built correctly, loads of beer cans strung together actually stay afloat. Apparently, the key is to *empty* the beer cans before affixing them together. Bored by boats? Then maybe you'll be interested in the thong-throwing contest. Hard to say, but I think those are empty, too.
* July 22-23: Stilt Dancing
Anguiano, Spain, is home to a small community of stilt dancers who twirl and twist throughout the city's streets. In honor of the city's patron saint, Mary Magdalene, the stilt dancers are composed of the town's men and boys who dress in brightly-colored shirts and petticoats that trail to their ankles while exposing the 3-foot wooden stilts below them.
The dancing begins at the city's central church, where the human tops dance down the front steps of the church and along the steep, cobbled streets into the town square. The dancers move in a tight, spinning motion that requires dexterity and bravery, and no, they would NOT think it was funny if you unleashed a big bag full of marbles.
*July 28 and 29: BLMA's 12-Hour Endurance Race
In July, over 40 teams will test their mettle in The British Lawn Mower Racing Association's flagstone event: the 12-hour endurance race. Racing mowers? Isn't that kinda pointless? Actually, since the event begins at 8 pm and lasts through the night, it's downright grueling. See for yourself.
* July 27: Mighty Mud Mania
In 1976, Johnson's Wax traveled to Scottsdale, Arizona, to hold a "Shout It Out Decathlon," a gimmick for a new product it was launching called "Shout." Though the Decathalon was indeed staged, Johnson's reportedly never planned a return trip, because the Arizona mud was too tough for the product. However, the City of Scottsdale felt the activity was too cool to forget about, and the activity -- re-named Mighty Mud Mania -- has been held ever since.
On the last Friday in July, parents can bring their children to the mud-filled, ooze-filled, filth-filled event at 8am. Participation is free, but the city asks mud-magnets to donate a non-perishable food item to benefit the local food bank. For kids 6 and younger, there's a mini mud course and puddle pools.
* July 28: Cardboard Boat Race
During the last weekend in July, participants race their boats in Heber Springs, deep in Arkansas' Ozark mountains. What's unusual about that, you ask? What's unusual is that the boats are made entirely out of corrugated cardboard and the winning boat must complete 4 heats around a 200-yard semicircle course.
Aware that building a boat from cardboard is not intuitive, organizers have created a brief How-to in PDF form, to help guide your initial brainstorming. The Race begins at 9am, and is followed by a corrugated Watermelon Eating Contest.
* July 29: Fiesta of Near Death Experiences
This unusual festival is for people who have come close to death but lived to talk about it. Bizarrely, they attend church in a coffin, borne aloft by members of their family. (Sadly, if you have no friends or family, you have to carry your own coffin into the church.)
Held in Las Nieves, a small town in Galicia near the border with Portugal, thousands of people fill the narrow streets on the day of Santa Maria to hear the sad and sometimes disturbing stories of the survivors. After the somber event, though, things start to turn fun, as fireworks and street food compete for the attention of participants.
Got the inside track on an unusual festival? Let us know about it!
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