Gadling

Perhaps you've been on an airplane and heard the following PA, "Ladies and gentleman, all the overhead bins are full, so if you've brought on board a bag that does not completely fit under the seat in front of you, please bring it to the front of the aircraft to be checked."

Here's the thing about that little PA, there's no ifs, ands, or buts about it, the bag will have to be checked - even if you're a celebrity. That includes you, Sharon Stone.

Perez Hilton recently reported that Sharon Stone made a scene when she refused to check two bags on a Delta flight from Kalispell, MT to Salt Lake City. There are very few details to the story, but Stone's rep, Paul Bloch, said that Sharon was allowed to take two bags onto the airplane, but a "stewardess" on board screamed at her not once, but twice, that she couldn't have the luggage before the actress surrendered the bags. I'm not exactly sure how or when Stone made a "scene," because again, the details are lacking, but Sharon Stone was met by security at the end of the flight. Her rep states that they were "private security" hired by Stone.

Now for a little advice. If a flight attendant tells you that you're going to have to check your bag, just check the bag. Don't make a scene. Don't tell the flight attendant how many miles you've flown or try to explain who you are. It doesn't matter. No, I will not take someone else's bag off the airplane so you can keep yours! And no, you can not stack your bag on top of the bags in the closet! FAA doesn't allow it. FAA rules are FAA rules and nothing is going to change that. Flight attendants don't make them up. Nor are we "abusing our power" when we enforce them. We're just doing our job. Did you know that by not enforcing those rules flight attendants can lose their job or get a hefty personal fine by the FAA? So unless you're willing to pay that fine or hire a flight attendant, release the death grip on the bag, please.

Back to Sharon Stone. Who knows what really went down on that Delta flight. What I do know is last year I had Sharon Stone on board a flight and while she sat in first class and kept to herself, she was always courteous when interacting with crew. What stood out the most about her was not her striking beauty or stylish outfit, but her well mannered traveling companion who always made a point to say please and thank you. The adorable young man, Stone's son, looked to be about three of four years-old at the time. He had to have learned those wonderful manners from someone, right? And while that doesn't prove anything, really, it does say a lot about Stone, because a polite child is a direct reflection of the parent.

Hi Heather,

I had an intriguing conversation with my best friend yesterday. His mom is now a retired American Airlines flight attendant. I've always been enamored with his ability to just hop on a flight whenever he wants for virtually no money. Just yesterday he was telling me the story how his mom only gets one registered companion (or whatever they call it) and since his sister is her register person, his mom had to find a friend to put him on as that persons registered person. That got me thinking, I wonder if I can find a really cool chick that I can compensate nicely to have her put me on as her registered companion (or whatever). Then I thought of who I know that's a flight attendant and I remembered your blog! Since I'm running my small company, I'm always forced to pay ridiculous fares for last minute trips, and the inability to be more flexible with my flights. Wanted to hear your thoughts on this. Do you know of this taking place? Or is it too good to be true? Anyway, great blog!....looking fwd to hearing from you.

Best,

Jason

Dear Jason,

Do you feel me smiling as I simultaneously shake my head slowly back and forth? Do you know this is a HUGE flight attendant pet peeve - asking for passes? You must have no idea how many times people ask flight attendants about their buddy passes, and these are mostly people we rarely even know, like people we just happen to meet in the course of our day! Like the mailman, or a taxi driver, or even a random colleague of the spouse. Just last month my son's preschool teacher hinted around for a pass. And my mother, who is also a flight attendant, was hit up by a nurse at her doctor's office.

You mentioned that your friend, the one whose mother is an ex flight attendant, is able to fly back and forth whenever he wants for "virtually no money", but that little bit of money is actually a lot of money to a flight attendant who is probably making on average 40K a year, and that's only if he/she works for a major airline and has decent seniority with the airline. Keep in mind that money is automatically docked out of a flight attendants pay check, which, after we pay our bills, could be described as "virtually no money" leftover for anything else. Did you know that flight attendants also get stuck paying the taxes on your trip at the end of the year? We do.

I live in Los Angeles and yesterday my 15 year-old cousin flew into town from New York with a group of fourteen 15 year-olds who had, oh....about 10 hours before their Qantas flight to Australia departed. Believe it or not, It isn't all that unusual for travelers heading overseas to have that much time in-between flights. Constantly I meet people aboard the airplane flying into LAX with hours and hours of sit time on their hands.

"So...what are you going to do before your next flight departs?" I often times ask.

Most of the time people have no idea what they're going to do, which is why they always ask me, the flight attendant, for a few suggestions. I'm going to tell you what I always tell them...

THREE HOURS OR LESS - If your sit time at the airport is less than three hours, sit tight. You don't want to miss your flight. Anyway, there's plenty of things to do at the airport. But if you do find yourself hungry and can't find anything to eat where you are, take a walk over to the Tom Bradley International Terminal where you'll find a few sit down restaurants outside of security. Or you can go down to baggage claim, walk outside and grab a complimentary shuttle to the Parking Spot, which is located right next to In-n-out Burger. That's where you'll find the best burger in town. Try ordering it "animal style."

FOUR HOURS OR MORE - If you've got four hours or more of sit time in Los Angeles at LAX, why not make a mini vacation before your vacation officially begins by visiting Hermosa Beach? Hermosa Beach is where you'll find the typical Southern California layed back experience. Just a fifteen minute cab ride from the airport, it shouldn't cost you more than $30 (with tip). Make sure to check the big bags, don't forget to pack your bathing suit in your carry on, and get ready to soak up the sun!

Gallery: Galley Gossip: Hermosa Beach Drum Circle

Recently I wrote a post, Flight attendant pet peeve #6 - the run around, about running the flight attendant ragged in flight. Now I wasn't complaining about passengers who use their call lights. Not at all. It's there for a reason. But there is a difference, a very big difference, between having needs and being needy. If you push the button once (or twice), I'd say you have a few needs you'd like to be met. That's fine. But If you're using it fifteen times on a three hour flight, you're a bit needy. And that's not so fine.

Speaking of having your needs met, this morning I read an interesting article about the power of Twitter in flight. By the way, did you know that I'm on twitter? Of course you may have heard that Oprah's on twitter. Maybe even you're on twitter. We're all on twitter. If you're not on twitter, perhaps it's time to change that. Why? I'll let James A Martin of PC World explain...

Believe it or not, this scenario actually occurred aboard a Virgin America flight, according to Porter Gale, the airline's vice president of marketing. Gale relayed the incident at a recent Twitter conference in San Francisco. (Virgin America's entire fleet is equipped with wi-if networking, which is how the passenger was able to tweet about the missing meal.)

Now I can't imagine the above scenario happening on board one of my flights, but I'm sure the flight attendant who was notified by the captain that 3B had been skipped couldn't believe it was happening on her flight either. Why this passenger didn't ring the call light, I don't know. Then again, why ring the call light when you can just tweet about it! Tweeting is all the rage right now, especially at 30,000 feet.

My job as a flight attendant is to be there in case of an emergency. Until then, I'll do whatever I can to make sure your flight runs as smoothly as possible. That's why I'm there. That's my job. And while I enjoy my job tremendously, there are a few things that annoy me.

Scott Carmichael touched on one of those things in his recent post, 10 passengers we love to hate: Day 8 - passengers who misuse the flight attendant call button. Whenever someone abuses the call light, I often times wonder if I'm unknowingly on an episode of Punk'd. Now don't get me wrong, I don't mind when passengers use their call lights, it's there for a reason, but there is a limit as to how many times you should use it. Fifteen times on a three hour flight is a bit much, don't ya think?

Another thing I find a bit much is when passengers can't seem to get it together, passengers who have a tendency to run me ragged, passengers who treat me like their own personal slave assistant. Here's an example of what not to do on a flight...

We've just finished the service and that's when I hear it - DING! Immediately I look up at the flight attendant panel and see that a passenger on the right hand side of the aircraft is calling. I step into the aisle, scan the cabin, and when I locate the light, I begin walking toward the single orange glow.

I reach up, push the button, and the light turns off. "Is there something I can get for you?"

"Diet Coke," you say, and because you're asking so soon after the service is over, I assume you were asleep when we came through the aisle with our carts.

"Sure, I'll be right back." To the rear of the aircraft and into the galley I go. I grab a plastic cup, a can of soda, and a napkin. Then I head back to your seat, placing it all on the tray table in front of you.

Gallery: Galley Gossip: The official laviators club

If you ever find yourself at La Guardia or John F. Kennedy International airport with a little sit time on your hands between flights, sit tight. Traffic in New York is terrible and you don't want to miss your flight. But if you've got four hours or more to kill, how about doing what flight attendants do. Grab a cab and head on over to Forest Hills, New York, which is located right next to Kew Gardens, otherwise known as Crew Gardens, which is located in Queens - just a short fifteen minute taxi ride from La Guardia and twenty minutes from JFK.

TAXI! Tell the yellow cab driver to drop you off on Austin Street and 71st Avenue in Forest Hills (off of Queens Boulevard). That will put right smack in the middle of everything. Austin Street is where it's at in terms of restaurants and shopping. There are even a few movie theaters if you've got the time. Approximately six blocks long, Austin Street has everything you could possible want within walking distance. When you're ready to head back to the airport, give Kew Gardens Car Service a call and they'll pick you up from wherever you are.

JUST WALK AROUND: After being cooped up in a germ infested flying tube for hours on end, there's nothing better than fresh air. Forest Hills is a wonderful place to just walk around and relax. It was named best cottage community in 2007 by Cottage Living Magazine. The homes are a mixture of magnificent and charming.

• Family of 6 in first class made the purser cry
• Customer service agent boarded the plane to calm passengers down which caused a late push back
• Lady got dizzy and needed oxygen in economy
• Lady ran from economy to first class lavatory seconds before take-off
• We missed our roll
• No kosher meal made a Jewish lady cry
• Had to do a "go-round" at JFK
• Late arrival
• Missed international connections
• More yelling passengers

It was a total scene! By the way, can you possibly find a nice pilot for me to date? He doesn't have to be HOT, just cute enough, and nice...oh and a pilot. LOL

Ron

Dear Ron,

Thank you for thinking of me...I think. I mean that was a crazy flight you experienced and I'm not so sure I want to be connected to that kind of drama. Now if you'd said it was a great flight and you thought of me, I'd be thrilled. But a bad flight? Not good. And that's exactly why I avoid the NY - Miami route at all costs. It's always a tough trip to work.

As for finding you a cute pilot to date, I'll definitely keep an eye out and I'll pass the word along to my mother who is also a flight attendant. Though that might not be such a great idea, considering one of the worst pilot dates I ever had was a blind date my mother arranged with a 757 first officer from New York. Not that I can pick them any better. My friend Cady, on the other hand, always had good luck with pilots and even married one. Perhaps her husband, an international Airbus Captain based in Miami, can be of assistance.

When my husband called me on my cell to tell me we had to move out of our house for a week while the hardwood floors were being refinished, I just stood in the middle of the food court at New York's John F. Kennedy international airport and sighed. It'd been a long two days of flying the unfriendly skies. Not to mention, the last thing I wanted to do on a day off was spend my valuable time confined in a cramped hotel room near the Los Angeles airport with my husband, three year-old son, and crazy cat, a twenty pound Maine coon.

"Are you serious?" I asked, falling into a plastic chair in front of a dirty table near McDonald's.

"It won't be that bad," my husband reassured me from all the way across the country where he sat, I imagined, feet propped up on his desk. "I'll get us a suite at the Residence Inn."

"Oh. Okay," I said, even though it was not okay, as I racked my overworked brain for other places to stay that might be okay, and that's when it hit me. "Wait! Don't book anything just yet. I've got an idea."

"This idea better not cost more than the Residence Inn," my husband said before we said goodbye and hung up the phone.

For the record, there's nothing wrong with the Residence Inn, but why stay in a hotel when there are other places to stay, better places to stay, like vacation rental homes right near the beach.

The first thing I did when I got back to my crashpad was change out of my navy blue polyester monkey suit and log onto the computer. I typed MANHATTAN BEACH VACATION HOMES into the search engine and soon found myself on the web site Homeaway.com. I scanned through hundreds of beautiful photos of amazing homes in Manhattan and Hermosa Beach, which is just a short twenty minute drive from the Los Angeles airport. I just knew there had to be something we could afford. On the beach. Under $1000/per week.

I was wrong.

Well, not entirely wrong, because all the places we could afford on the beach were either too small or already booked. Undeterred, I pressed on and found myself touring homes that were way out of our price range. I couldn't help myself. And then I did something crazy. I emailed the owner of a $5,000/a day Italian villa.

I wrote, "Okay fine, I'll take it off your hands for $2,000 a week."

Gallery: Galley Gossip: Manhattan Beach, CA

In Grant Martin's post, The top 5 myth's about getting an upgrade, he wrote...

Flight attendants have no control over who gets upgraded when there always might be one last business class passenger coming down the jet bridge right before departure, so they can't give away a seat. After the boarding door is closed? Maybe if you're discreet, but with everyone watching, the flight attendant will most definitely say no.

Now I don't know if Grant was ever a flight attendant, dated a flight attendant, or spends a lot of time in the galley talking to flight attendants, but he's absolutely right! Flight attendants do not have upgrading powers. But agents do, so make sure to talk to one before you board. That said, the only passengers I've ever seen upgraded for free after the door has been shut were uniformed military personel...and...well...they kind of deserve it, don't ya think?

Below is a list of 10 types of passengers who don't deserve an upgrade, but give it a shot anyway....

1. I-think-I'm-a-frequent-flier passenger - "I'm a frequent flier and..." That's how it starts. First of all, I can spot a frequent flier a mile away, so please don't tell me how many miles you've flown because that's my first clue you haven't flown as often as you think, not compared to our frequent fliers today. See those passengers sitting in the exit row, as well as the first three rows of coach? Those passengers are at the top of the upgrade list. The best seats on the airplane are held and/or blocked for passengers who fly tens of thousands of miles each year. Anyway, real frequent fliers know the drill, they know what to expect, and they know where, exactly, their name is on the upgrade list, which means I don't have to tell them they won't be getting an upgrade, the way I'm telling you, because they know, that I know, that they know exactly what's going on.

Just like Cliff Muskiet, the uniform freak, I have a thing for airline uniforms. I think most flight attendants do. In fact, inside my guestroom closet hangs three different uniform styles from two different airlines. I've saved it all - the pants, the skirts, the dresses, the jackets, the vests, the blouses, the wings, and even the blue tie I snapped around my neck and the epaulets I wore on both shoulders with the pleated Bermuda shorts and high heels at Sun Jet International Airlines. Talk about embarrassing. I still own everything except for the silky red and blue scarf I wore thirteen years ago when I first got hired to fly for the airline I currently work for. Oh how I wish I still had that scarf. I wore it off to the side, tied in a knot around my neck. That simple scarf made the conservative navy blue polyester uniform appear sexy and feminine.

"I loved that navy blue coat dress we wore years ago," said Cady, an ex flight attendant who is also my very best friend.

Personally, I prefer the look of the white starched blouse paired with the navy blue knee length skirt and fitted blazer, even though I always end up wearing the uniform dress. As a commuter, I have to pack what's easy.

Now my all time favorite airline uniform is worn by the flight attendants of Air France. Though they look great, I'm not quite sure how I would actually feel about serving drinks while wearing the big red bow at 35,000 feet. Delta looks fantastic in navy blue with just a hint of red. However the white bell sleeves, while stylish, seem like they could easily get dirty. That could be a problem for me. I'm a bit of a mess when I get stuck working in the galley, and a dirty uniform is an ugly uniform. Emirates' uniform is pretty nice - that is if you look good in Khaki and don't mind wearing a head scarf. The worst airline uniform has to be First Choice Airways. I mean seriously, pink?

As I began writing this post, I wondered what others thought about all the different airline uniforms, so I posed the question, which airlines have the best uniforms, on twitter.com and here's what a few people had to say...