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Vagabond Tales: Lunch on Guilty Beach, Cambodia
Lunch on Guilty Beach was a tough meal to swallow.
If you look on a map of Sihanoukville, Cambodia, you'll find beaches such as Victory Beach and Independence Beach, but you'll find no such place as Guilty Beach. Regardless of what a map might say, unofficially, every beach in Cambodia is Guilty Beach.
Guilty Beach is not just a Cambodian phenomenon, but rather a global destination that can be found along coastlines the world over. It's in Los Cabos, Mexico, in the shadow of the famous Cabo arch. It's in Jaco, Costa Rica, backed up by sagging palm trees and world class surf. It's in Asilah, Morocco; it's in Mabul, Malaysia. Guilty Beach is every beach in the world where those unfortunate individuals living well below the poverty line--many of them children--work the beach in the hope of squeaking out much less than a living; most likely, they're just trying to make that night's dinner.
While beach merchants and scam artists can often be viewed as hawkers selling goods you would never want, Guilty Beach, Cambodia is thusly labeled because here it is different. Children don't prod you to buy some fake sunglasses--they simply ask for a bite of your food. Men don't sell knockoff jewelry for extra beer money. Rather, children sell bracelets while carrying their infant brother in their arms because their parents are too sick, or worse, dead.
Guilty Beach is thusly named because I no longer want that $2 plate of fried noodles, or that $1 can of beer. How can I accept that $2 plate of food when I just told an 11 year-old girl I didn't want her $2 bracelet? Then to eat it in front of her, as her eyes fail to flinch from the fried fare before me.
If you look on a map of Sihanoukville, Cambodia, you'll find beaches such as Victory Beach and Independence Beach, but you'll find no such place as Guilty Beach. Regardless of what a map might say, unofficially, every beach in Cambodia is Guilty Beach.
Guilty Beach is not just a Cambodian phenomenon, but rather a global destination that can be found along coastlines the world over. It's in Los Cabos, Mexico, in the shadow of the famous Cabo arch. It's in Jaco, Costa Rica, backed up by sagging palm trees and world class surf. It's in Asilah, Morocco; it's in Mabul, Malaysia. Guilty Beach is every beach in the world where those unfortunate individuals living well below the poverty line--many of them children--work the beach in the hope of squeaking out much less than a living; most likely, they're just trying to make that night's dinner.
While beach merchants and scam artists can often be viewed as hawkers selling goods you would never want, Guilty Beach, Cambodia is thusly labeled because here it is different. Children don't prod you to buy some fake sunglasses--they simply ask for a bite of your food. Men don't sell knockoff jewelry for extra beer money. Rather, children sell bracelets while carrying their infant brother in their arms because their parents are too sick, or worse, dead.
Guilty Beach is thusly named because I no longer want that $2 plate of fried noodles, or that $1 can of beer. How can I accept that $2 plate of food when I just told an 11 year-old girl I didn't want her $2 bracelet? Then to eat it in front of her, as her eyes fail to flinch from the fried fare before me.
So why not buy the $2 bracelet? Why not donate my meal? Because the sad reality is knowing you cannot help them all; that there are no amount of bracelets that will heal this heart wrenching dilemma. Furthermore, the precedent set by rewarding begging can be far more disastrous than the apparent problems you're trying to prevent.
Finally, it's a somber truth knowing that these innocent faces, with bulging stomachs and bulging eyes, are merely working for someone above them, whether it's family or otherwise. The average tourist won't buy sliced mango from a fully grown man, but they'll open up their wallet for a child. And sadly, everyone knows it. These are merely conscripted child soldiers in a brutal reality of poverty and survival.
"They tell us to say that," the little girl confesses. She has just asked us to "open our hearts by opening our wallets." It's a heavy line that's been proven to work.
How do you deny an 11 year-old girl of $2 while she holds an infant and tries not to cry? How do you not look at all of them, 20 or 30 deep, wishing you could buy all of their bracelets so they can go play in the water like all 9 and 11 year-olds should?
Even if you buy them from two, three, or eight different children, eventually you have to tell one no, and is their pain dampened any by the fact you just helped the eight previous? The guilt is nonetheless the same. A line intrinsically must be drawn somewhere, but that line never gets any less painful, or justifiable. We gave the girl $1 for a smaller bracelet, and she left despondently, a sense of failure in her face. Nobody wins in this game.
Even more, who am I that you should even feel the need to beg to me? I don't deserve this phony pedestal you place me upon. I don't deserve this plate of food you lust after. I don't deserve to sit on this beach, in this comfortable chair, and lead an easier life than you.
Lunch on Guilty Beach was a tough meal to swallow.
Finally, it's a somber truth knowing that these innocent faces, with bulging stomachs and bulging eyes, are merely working for someone above them, whether it's family or otherwise. The average tourist won't buy sliced mango from a fully grown man, but they'll open up their wallet for a child. And sadly, everyone knows it. These are merely conscripted child soldiers in a brutal reality of poverty and survival.
"They tell us to say that," the little girl confesses. She has just asked us to "open our hearts by opening our wallets." It's a heavy line that's been proven to work.
How do you deny an 11 year-old girl of $2 while she holds an infant and tries not to cry? How do you not look at all of them, 20 or 30 deep, wishing you could buy all of their bracelets so they can go play in the water like all 9 and 11 year-olds should?
Even if you buy them from two, three, or eight different children, eventually you have to tell one no, and is their pain dampened any by the fact you just helped the eight previous? The guilt is nonetheless the same. A line intrinsically must be drawn somewhere, but that line never gets any less painful, or justifiable. We gave the girl $1 for a smaller bracelet, and she left despondently, a sense of failure in her face. Nobody wins in this game.
Even more, who am I that you should even feel the need to beg to me? I don't deserve this phony pedestal you place me upon. I don't deserve this plate of food you lust after. I don't deserve to sit on this beach, in this comfortable chair, and lead an easier life than you.
Lunch on Guilty Beach was a tough meal to swallow.
Reader Comments (Page 1 of 1)
Srey Chilat Jan 12th 2012 1:00PM
The author, sadly, fails to see deeper into the cause of this situation and recognize that he CAN make a huge difference.
A major root cause of this problem is that many Cambodian girls are removed from school before they complete grade 3 (if they get to go at all). As children, this makes them extremely vulnerable to all kinds of manipulation and abuse.
Later, as young women, that lack of basic education makes it impossible for them to get a job with a livable wage - enough money to care for their children - who wind up on that beach, and elsewhere.
Almost nobody is helping adult Cambodian women get the education they were denied as girls - so they can finally build a self-sufficient, decent life for themselves, and properly care for their children. Seems like the major orgs just write women off as "lost causes" when they reach 18, which is foolish and wrong.
The only group I know that is doing a good job is the Women's Library, run by the US Non-profit GETSET-GO.org, in Siem Reap Cambodia. They provide a safe, women-friendly environment where women can go and learn, and network - and turn that education into good paying TOURSIM-related jobs.
So I hope Kyle, and anyone else who is truly interested in helping these children, will check out their web site and support the Women's Library - and any other org helping to empower Cambodian women (i.e. the mothers of these children) with the education they need to eliminate this problem for good.
MollyJ Jan 14th 2012 1:15AM
You should not buy food for these children and you should not buy the trinkets they sell. This teaches them to trust strangers. You may be decent but the next person may be a pedophile that lures them by giving them food or being "kind" to them. Sihanoukville actually has an amazing street child organization, M'Lop Tapang, that helps hundreds of children like the ones pictured. As long as tourists feed them and give them money it is hard for aid organizations to get them to attend school and feeding programs that can better prepare them for a promising future. In Phnom Penh, The Riverkids Project or Friends International help street children like those pictured. You never want to encourage children to engage in acts that may put them at further risk. It is really hard to say no but saying yes to their requests really does them more harm. Consider contributing to locally based organizations when you travel that help the kids you see and feel sorry for. Childsafe.org has great tips for travelers about things you should and should not do when traveling. We teach our children in the US to avoid strangers. We should have the same standards for children when traveling abroad.
hannah Jan 13th 2012 2:18AM
I went to childsafe.org and it didn't seem legitimate- just another ad website, is it possible there is an alternate address?
Kyle Ellison Jan 13th 2012 6:25AM
Not sure about child safe, but the author actually heads up his own nonprofit in Cambodia called One Degree Forward which raises money for scholarships for deserving students, many of whom are orphans. As a few readers have pointed out, education is one of the best ways to stem this unfortunate reality.
CamKids Jan 14th 2012 7:51AM
Despite the somewhat naive statements, the point about misguided help is valid.
Please support our work with poor and sick children in Cambodia.
CamKids - The Cambodian Children's Charity
www.camkids.org
www.facebook.com/camkids - please 'like' our FB Page
www.camkids.blogspot.com - news blog
www.twitter.com/camkids - @camkids
You can make a donation via one of the above or at www.bit.ly/singdonate or www.bit.ly/regdonate
Thank you