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Ten clear signs you're in the wrong city for Christmas
Christmastime is a special time for Christians, and also for non-Christians who don't mind the excuse to decorate, eat, and exchange presents. One of the main chagrins of perpetual travelers is that they often find themselves in the wrong city for Christmas. Being away from family is one thing, but sometimes, December 25 can roll by without feeling like a "real Christmas" at all. I feel weird even celebrating sans snow.I understand that not all Gadling readers observe the Christmas holiday, but I do, and this is for those of you who do, too -- and who knows? Maybe even some people who don't celebrate Christmas can appreciate this article in the spirit in which it was intended: lightheartedly. Here are 10 clear signs you're in the wrong city for Christmas.
You know you're in the wrong city for Christmas when...
- The only smell of pine is coming from the cardboard "freshening" apparatus dangling from your cab driver's rear-view mirror.
- When someone says "Merry Christmas" or "Happy Holidays" to you, you feel insecure about not blending in well enough.
- You at any point attempt to decorate a palm tree.
- None of the shopkeepers seem to understand your impulse to "decorate" a cookie (and they certainly don't know where you can get some of those delicious non-edible silver dragees).
- The only Christmas tree you can procure is below waist-high.
- Friends brutally mock you for having believed in Santa Claus ever, like, even if it was over 30 years ago.
- You at any point attempt to hang ornaments on something that isn't a tree (or the friend who mocked you).
- You can look around and feel certain that not one person in your vicinity knows the trials and tribulations of Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer.
- You forgo inviting friends over for a few days because you don't know how they'll react to the oversized socks hanging from your fireplace.
- Every time you think you see a nativity scene, it turns out to just be a manger with people around it.
[Photo by avlxyz via Flickr.]
Filed under: Arts and Culture
Reader Comments (Page 1 of 1)
Kojotovski Dec 23rd 2010 9:18PM
not everyone is christian...and why would non-christians celebrate x-mas anyway? x-mas is celebration of the birth of J.C., not celebration of shopping and irrelevant to religion x-mas trees!
surfersweety415 Dec 25th 2010 10:45PM
That is completely arrogant for anyone to ask why a non christian would celebrate christmas. Have you ever thought that maybe Christmas is a time to celebrate being with family and friends, and giving to, and loving the ones you care about? There are plenty of non christians that celebrate christmas.
and PS
There is ABSOLUTELY NOTHING wrong with decorating a palm tree...its called a California Christmas and I think its AWESOME!
Rebekah Dec 26th 2010 6:07AM
Then why would a Christian celebrate Christmas? Jesus wasn't born on Dec 25, he was clearly born in the fall. Everything about a traditional Christmas celebration is pagan.
The Romans celebrated Saturnalia in the week leading up to Dec 25th, which is also the day of the winter solstice. The festival was characterized by gift-giving, feasting and singing as the priests of Saturn carried wreaths of evergreen boughs in procession throughout the Roman temples.
The Christmas tree...the evergreen is the sacred tree of the Scandinavian god Odin and it is Odin in that culture that leaves gifts under his tree.
Mistletoe is a pagan fertility symbol. Christmas ornaments are symbols of the sun and hearkens back to the Roman Saturnalia.
This just covers a few, there are many more.
Brian Dec 25th 2010 10:25PM
You know you're in the wrong place when when:
What seems to be carolers turns out to be hotel/restaurant staff who have obviously just memorized the words to the song, and have no idea what the words mean.
When the staff is scared of cooking the turkey because "its the largest bird I have ever seen".
Rebekah Dec 26th 2010 6:05AM
Then why would a Christian celebrate Christmas? Jesus wasn't born on Dec 25, he was clearly born in the fall. Everything about a traditional Christmas celebration is pagan.
The Romans celebrated Saturnalia in the week leading up to Dec 25th, which is also the day of the winter solstice. The festival was characterized by gift-giving, feasting and singing as the priests of Saturn carried wreaths of evergreen boughs in procession throughout the Roman temples.
The Christmas tree...the evergreen is the sacred tree of the Scandinavian god Odin and it is Odin in that culture that leaves gifts under his tree.
Mistletoe is a pagan fertility symbol. Christmas ornaments are symbols of the sun and hearkens back to the Roman Saturnalia.
This just covers a few, there are many more.
F.C. Boyd Dec 26th 2010 2:19PM
I don't celebrate Christmas but enjoyed your post and Brian's add on. I do touch base with family and friends at the end of the day...mostly just to give them time to vent the stress the holiday has brought on. We end up poking fun of the happenings of the day. The conversation always ends in a great laugh and a "Thank you for calling, I needed that!" :-0
dr Dec 26th 2010 2:29PM
Why is it that the only acceptable Christmas celebration to some is based on the Dickens interpretation? All Christians do not live in northern latitudes. Here's how to tell you are in the right place for Christmas: Your Mamere teases you with what you'll get for Christmas "Un ti rien tout neuf, dans une boite sans fond, aux manches a dents de poule!" (A box of nothing with a bottom and chicken feet for handles)The entire community builds bonfires of sugar cane stalks along the river to light the way for Papa Noel in a pirogue pulled by alligators named Gaston, Renee, etc. You won't find many turkeys, hams, or rack's of prime of the table - It's gumbo.
Nancy Dec 26th 2010 6:12PM
Re #4 --how can you have something be "delicious" if it's non-edible? Lame writing, stupid article.