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Galley Gossip: 9/11 - We will never forget

by Heather Poole (RSS feed) on Sep 11th 2009 at 9:30AM

Silence has strength. Often times silence is more powerful than words. Today I have decided not to remain silent.

That's Terry Thames, an American Airlines pilot, hanging out of the cockpit window. This is the first American Airlines flight returning to Washington Dulles after the skies were reopened four days after 9/11. The photo was featured in the book, Reclaiming the Sky, by Tom Murphy.

I can't stop staring at the photo and thinking about how great it must have felt to have hung that American flag across that airplane when it finally came home. I love that photo. Maybe because it's one of the few taken at that time depicting strength, not sorrow. Which is exactly what many of my colleagues, as well as our passengers, radiated when they walked on board the airplanes and soldiered on days after our world completely changed.

Last year on this very day I wrote a post, 9/11 - That day, about what had happened to me eight years ago and how it still affects my colleagues and I today. The best part about the post were the readers comments, all so full of hope and strength. I didn't want to write another 9/11 post. Really, I didn't. What more could I say? But then how could I not? I'm a flight attendant. If I don't write about it, who will?

A few days ago I logged into Twitter and typed, "We will never forget," and then I pressed send. The message went to @planesofthought, an organization that collects thoughts and turns them into paper airplanes that will cover New York City's skyline to remember the lives lost on 9/11.

After that I wrote, "I'm looking for interesting 9/11 stories. How it may have changed your life in a positive way."

No one answered back. Not one person. The silence was deafening.

I tried again on Facebook and this time I got a response - one response. "Positive? That's a hard one. I guess how New Yorkers found some closeness. American pride came back. Sadly, it's slipping away again," wrote Lynne, a fellow flight attendant and friend.

While I couldn't agree more, I worried that I may not have gotten my message across the way I had intended, so I added, "I'm looking for stories about people who started doing things they always wanted to do, but never did, before 9/11."

Again, no response. Complete silence

I prayed my question did not offend and decided, once again, not to write this post.

While we're constantly reminded of 9/11 every single time we go to the airport, take off our shoes,and throw out our bottled water before passing through security, grumbling about it as we do so, it does seem, at times, as if it never happened, that day, eight years ago. But I don't think we've forgotten. In fact, I know we haven't because I truly believe silence has meaning.

Just as I was about to scratch this post for good, Jeffrey sent a note via Facebook. "I worked for an airline and took a buyout offer on 9/28/01. Hired a career coach. Became one. Used the buyout money to launch a successful executive coaching business. Launched a second entrepreneurial venture in 2008, which is my passion - SAVVY NAVIGATOR."

Slowly, but surely, the stories began to trickle in. Erin, who described herself as a mother/wife/traveler, wrote, "My whole life is still divided by pre/post 9/11...for better or worse."

Mark, a frequent flier, wrote, "Heather, you may have seen this story before. It's about a United Airlines flight attendant who was supposed to be on United Airlines flight 175 that crashed into the Twin Towers. Because of a typo and then later computer problems she couldn't trade to get her trip back. On the employee bus that day she actually spoke with the flight attendant who "took her trip."

I clicked the link Mark had attached and wound up on the Boston Globe web site where I read a story, Flight attendant changes course, I'd never heard before about a flight attendant who just barely survived 9/11, a flight attendant who is now a nurse.

Next it was Chris, a pilot, who wrote, "I think I have a real problem with the context. When I was an Air Force pilot, I knew what I was doing could get me killed. That was my job, and I accepted it. And I accepted when every 9 months or so, one of my buds became, as we used to say, a "mort" (mortality), or "a ghost" (as in, "Remember Bugs? Sea of Japan--he's a ghost"). That was the deal."

"9/11 was not the deal," Chris added. "Our colleagues weren't anything but murdered. They had no chance, and no choice. That's a breach of faith, and too high a price. I don't know who to blame, who to accuse, who to hold responsible, who to fight back against. And yet, our management makes us all just cost units, marketable, forgetable commodities. Okay, I'll shut up now."

And with that the silence continued...

While this post initially started out as a story about your stories, it quickly turned into a post without a story, which made me a little sad. But that, in itself, is a story - one that should be told. I'm a flight attendant. If I don't write about it, who will?

Photos courtesy of (American Airlines) Tom Murphy, (flag quilt) Catface3, (9/11 tribute light) PlanetGordon.com

Filed under: United States, Airlines, Galley Gossip

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Reader Comments (Page 1 of 1)

TheFlyingPinto Sep 11th 2009 9:46AM

Thanks, Heather for speaking...I still don't have words eight years later.

Alex Sep 11th 2009 1:16PM

Hi Heather,

You got a typo - United Airlines flight 15 should be flight 175. Wow kind of ironic that in that same paragraph you discussed a typo that saved her life! What a story.

Alex Sep 11th 2009 1:19PM

My mistake, should be his life.

Alex Sep 11th 2009 1:22PM

Wait it should be her, the flight attendent was a she it was just a guy that wrote the tweet. Wow I def drank too much last night.

Zach Sep 11th 2009 1:42PM

Hey Heather, you're right, we will never forget...9/11 affected me in a positive way by helping me to realize whats really important to me in my life, which is family and happiness and to not take anything for granted. Live life to the fullest!

P.S - Im so glad I came across a link that sent me here to your articles! I love everything about aviation and I have learned so much from your posts! They are all so interesting and fun to read! You have a new fan here in S.C!!!

maggie Sep 11th 2009 2:04PM

Hello Heather,

Thanks for posting such an elaborate response to my question of becoming an FA. I very much appreciate it. Even though I certainly don't look like that fellow with the tray of cola in his hands.... lololo You are right about the whole thing and I will go to the airlines themselves and apply with them and take their training as required. I get a kick out of the blogs that go on your site galley gossip.

I haven't responded back to you all this time regarding my situation outcome only because I was pondering over the devastation mark of 9/11 , should I or shouldn't I. My son's are now 19 and the youngest is turning 17 next month and graduating in June 2010 As I layed my head down to sleep last night, I pondered over the same questions, what if something like 9/11 happens again? should I shouldn't I? but then it came to me. Yes damn it , I want to be a FA.....why should I not, the stupidity of those people who went to great lengths to try and break us of our freedoms and rights and of our laughter and smiles should not stop me from reaching my dreams. Why should the lack of their freedoms, rights and laughter and smiles put gloom over my life or anyone else's. All I know is you can't fix stupid! and that we can do is band together and enjoy life to it's fullest for you only get out of it as much as you put into it. I applaud you Heather for not remaining silent today, today on this beautiful September 11 2009 day embrace everything that makes you feel good and if that works do it again and again.

yours truly,

Maggie from Kamloops BC Canada

Bruce Sep 11th 2009 4:24PM

Thanks for your story Heather. We were all changed by 9/11 - some more than others - some more evident than others. It is sad that, with each passing year, fewer and fewer people take the time to mark this day and remember. We each can tell the story of where we were and what we were doing when we watched or heard about the attack.

It is people like you who continue to write about it that make us stop for a moment an remember and that is a good thing.

Thanks again!

Tyrrell Sep 11th 2009 6:16PM

Thank you for this story. It was very brave.

LDinCT Sep 11th 2009 9:10PM

I was on one of the first flights out of Hartford, CT after 9/11, going to a funeral in Louisiana. There were 10 of us on the flight heading to Atlanta but the airline said they wanted to show everyone our strength, that we would continue to fly. It was a large plane and they moved all of us to first class where we remained completely silent during the entire flight.

Back home and in the aftermath, they showed the path of the planes from Boston and it appeared one of them flew directly over the highway that I drive on daily to work. Since that day, every day, when I see a plane in the sky, I say a "Please be safe"

Ron Sep 11th 2009 8:21PM

What could be better fitting for a 9/11 post, a story about 9/11 stories-we all have one. Thanks for not being silent Heather! We will never forget!!

Steve Sep 13th 2009 2:43PM

On 9/11/01 I was working as a Chicago based FA for American Trans Air. September 11th was the last day of a 3 day trip. On that morning I and my fellow cabin crew were supposed to deadhead back to Chicago from Ft. Lauderdale and then our trip was done We all met in the hotel lobby to take the van to the airport when a Delta crew came into the hotel from the airport and told us the airport was closing. I remember us watching events unfold on TV in the hotel lobby, it all seemed so surreal. We were in Ft. Lauderdale until that following Saturday when we finally flew back to Chicago. What I still remember so clearly about that flight back was that there was complete silence, no one talked during the boarding process, in flight and after landing. The entire plane was complete silence, people were still in shock.

Victoria Sep 13th 2009 2:42PM

9/11 changed my life for better and for worse.

I was a pilot then, working for Continental. My brand new marriage was nearly destroyed due to lack of understanding on the part of my spouse about what I was going through after that day. I was based in Newark, and looked at the towers nearly every day. The loss of flight crews was the loss of my extended family!

However, the events of 9/11 convinced me to create a family with my husband, and now I have three gorgeous boys.

I no longer work for the airlines, I just couldn't stand the treatment and (man)handling of employees. I'm going to graduate school in the medical field now.

Mark Sep 13th 2009 2:41PM

Thank you Heather I used to work for American Airlines care team. I will never forgot the screams of horror, the tears of relief, or the prayers from that day. Sadly you are right it Pearl Harbour's horror was a deep part of our country for very long time. Sadly it just seems like today folks look at 9/11 as a Oh well thats the world it happens but there are many who have not forgotten and will never ever forget where we were the day the world stopped turning.

Billee Sep 13th 2009 2:40PM

Heather - I can post for you a positive story of life change as a result of 9/11.
Directly after 9/11 my son, a new college graduate, left his IT job and enlisted in the Navy, just as his grandfather had done immediately after Pearl Harbor.
From that decision he was in the place to meet my daughter-in-law, resulting in my now having two beautiful grandchildren and a 3rd on the way. What better triumph of life over destruction?
He remains in the Navy to this day, still serving, and a complete change for all of our family.

Lin Sep 13th 2009 5:43PM

Heather it's hard to think of anything positive that came out of our tragedy but I will try.
My daughter who was 11 at that time walked with me everyday for excercise and chat. After the 9/11 tragedy we saw the area that we walked in changed on land and sky and we are in Worcester, Ma. We saw a very large truck that was accepting donations of water etc for the brave people working at the site. There were signs around, for a few days, expressing what was happening there and others signs of personal prayer. In the skies, every day, for a long while, we saw constant fighter jets leaving their contrails in the sky in numbers that I had never seen before. I explained that to my daughter. We talked about how our county was reacting to the biggest and worst tragedy we had ever suffered together. We felt safer to see our planes in practice and protection over us. We saw how people in our city were affected and helping all they could with big broken hearts. To think that this was happening all over America moved us to silence after a while and we walked in large circles to be able to watch the gathering of small trucks from different places or businesses bringing what they had for the donation. It felt as if it had happened here, there was so much emotion. Since then, yes, it has quieted down and the spirit of those days and weeks quieted down and we all soldiered on in our daily life. We are different, I think, because we saw firsthand what people will be like if we are ever in an emergency again. We saw how people drop their routines and go into action in anyway that is possible. My daughter went with me the first night that blood was taken so that I could give. The line was so long that I could not see the end of it.
Turned out that tragically the blood was not needed but the experience of being an American reaching out to other Americans, I won't forget. I hope we are never tested again, but now my twenty one year old daughter is graduating in constitutional law and political science and you have me wondering if it was what she saw that drew her in that direction. I watch everything that is available on the anniversarys and visit the ground zero with her to leave a simple flower and a prayer. The little church that stood through it all is filled with mementos and artifacts from the tragedy so we stop there for a prayer. Everyone should walk through that little church that stood, and see the pictures and actual artifacts from that day It was the place to let everyone who needed a place to lay down and sleep do that. There were people there taking care of the tired and had pillows etc and water for them. It's quite an experience.
Thank you Heather for this format. Never saw it before. God bless us all.

vern Sep 14th 2009 8:20PM

much love to you , I hope as the 9 11 truth unveils you remain strong , much love.

Screw-the-DNC Sep 14th 2009 11:09PM

Hey Heather,
I am a longtime lurker and road warrior and I greatly enjoy your posts!

I was definitely changed by 9/11. On that morning I was in a staff meeting in our corp HQ conf room, which happened to overlook the field at Roanoke, VA. First someone came in and told us the news and we were glued to the TV, then we became glued to the field, where one after another planes began to land as they were ordered out of the air. It was a foreign sight at such a small regional airport.

So what changed for the better after 9/11? That's easy and hard to answer.

I'll take the easy answers first. Like many who've already responded, I found myself to be more patriotic in the months and years following, which reconnected me emotionally to my estranged father, a career military man. He used to work in a ground floor outer office in the Pentagon, one facade over from the office that was hit. While it took a few years more for us to physically reconnect I truly believe a seed was planted that day.

The hard answers are the intangibles. As I travel I do my best to be laid back and to encourage the airline workers who are as stressed as I have ever seen them yet remain friendly and professional (for the most part ;>). I find myself more intentional about my relationships, my career and my life in general. At the same time, I know I live with a thinly veiled fear that another shoe will drop - another strike will occur.

Anyway, thanks for writing the post - I think it's something we all need to reflect on - like it or not.

Robin Sep 16th 2009 9:33PM

Heather - thought you might enjoy an article on www.consumertraveler.com entitled "Flight Attendants - unsung heroes 8 years later". It's a very nice article about our profession.

Debbie Lee Sep 17th 2009 2:00PM

Thanks for deciding to write this post... These stories and memories always bring tears to my eyes... I think 'Chris, the pilot' says something very poignant about our profession (I am a NWA F/A) - When we went to work pre-9/11, we figured it would be the 'usual'... work a few flights serving our drinks/meals, interact w/ nice & not-so-nice pax, layover and start again... Little did we know that overnight we'd turn into the least appreciated, least recognized, least remembered First Responders to a tragedy that noone will ever forget - except for the travelling public every time they get on board an airplane and give us grief for 'just doing our job'.
I don't think any of us expect a lot - I think we expect a little respect, a little appreciation, a little understanding & a feeling of being a valuable part of our company.
Keep up the great work, Heather. I've been lurking for awhile & always enjoy your posts!
Debbie :)

marcieileen Oct 4th 2009 10:52AM

I discovered your site just today. As destiny would have it, I had bid to be off over 9-11-01. A close friend based in FLA called me at 6.45am PT to alert me to the unfolding horrors, & to make sure I wasn't working one of the flts. Staffing for AA#11 & 77 is sometimes crewed by LAX & in fact, I had worked #77 IAD-LAX more than once over the previous few years. I also had worked a flt with Chic Burlingame (the Capt on 77 that fateful day). I remember being struck with how outgoing & affable he was. I admire his sister, Debra, for keeping the fight going for awareness & accountability (www.theaviationnation.com/debra-burlingame-biograpy).

When I left my place that morning for a long-awaited new-patient appt (the reason I had bid to be off that day), I found my neighbor in tears. As an East Coast transplant she was feeling the loss personally - with many relatives back there. As we commiserated, I told her "the world as we know it has changed forever". I had never felt such an overwhelming sadness.

I do not sweat the small stuff now. The industry in general, & our F/A jobs in particular have suffered greatly. I opted for a buyout in Aug 2008 &, being old enough, moved directly into retirement. I'm sorry I felt compelled to resign, & I wish things were different. But it's not the same job (well truthfully, that's been the case for many, many years), not the same business environment, hell - - not the same world.