Wife-Carrying: This occurs at Sonkajärvi, in eastern Finland. The contest dates back to 1992, though the tradition traces to the 19th century (if you can believe the locals). The world championships are held on July 3 and 4.

Mobile-Phone Throwing: Staged in Punkaharju, also in eastern Finland, show up on August 22 to throw an "official" cell phone as far as you can. In case you were worried, "there will be no doping tests. However the jury can rule out the contestant if his/her mental or physical preparedness is not adequate for full a performance." I guess that means everyone.

Sauna Bathing Contest: Attend the 11th Sauna World Championships in Heinola, and you'll get hot. It's held on August 7 and 8, during which "competitors have to sit in the sauna with buttocks and thighs on the seat." Wait, it gets better: "Posture must be erect [I bet!]; elbows must stay on the knees and arms have to be in an upright position. The competitor will have to leave the sauna without outside help; otherwise he/she will be disqualified."

Air Guitar Playing: Your friends used to laugh at you ... and they will again if they watch you at this unusual competition. You and other would-be rock stars will converge on Club Teatria in Oulu in northern Finland (where else would you find something like this?). If you aren't ready for prime time, attend a training session, lecture or demonstration. (No, you can't make this shit up.) The event runs from August 19 to 21.

Swamp Football: It is what it is. Go to Hyrynsalmi on July 17 and 18 and try to kick a soccer ball in the mud. There's no offside rule, which clearly solves everything.

In case these aren't eccentric enough for you, there are other choices: mosquito swatting, milking stool throwing and sitting on an ant's nest. I really wish I were lying about this last one ... I really do.