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Things NOT to do at Mardi Gras in New Orleans (unless you want to go to jail)
Despite it's relaxed, party atmosphere, the city of New Orleans has laws -- even during Mardi Gras. Further, the city has a concentration of NOPD officers, ATF, and undercover police in the French Quarter during Carnival to enforce these laws. If you're heading to the Big Easy for the Mardi Gras, here are a few things you might be tempted to do, but should consider otherwise. And remember: just because you see other people doing it doesn't make it legal! DO NOT urinate in the streets. If you're in the French Quarter and need to pee, do not -- no matter how bad you have to go -- pee in the streets. Not only is it disrespectful to the city, it's also one of the easiest ways to get thrown in the drunk tank for the weekend. Instead, pay a few bucks to get into a bar, club, or restaurant and order a drink to use their facilities; you'll end up saving a lot of money in the long run when you don't have to get bailed out of jail. Or if you have time to spare, hunt out a port-o-potty. They're typically painted bright yellow and strategically located at most intersections on Bourbon. There's also a large bank of portable toilets located on Chartres Street, two blocks southeast of Bourbon, in between Conti and St. Louis. Here's a map, along with the quickest route from Bourbon. When you're sober, seek out these free toilets and walk to Bourbon, taking note of landmarks on the way so that when you're drunk later on, you can find your way back. Plus, seeking these out on a regular basis throughout the night gives you a good excuse to escape the crowds on Bourbon and relax a little.
Gallery: Mardi Gras in New Orleans
DO NOT get naked. Ladies and gentleman: take note. While the laws are typically relaxed for women, I've still seen a few get popped for flashing breasts, so be careful -- it's technically illegal. But whatever you do, don't flash anything below the waist. Guys, there's hardly anything more embarrassing than getting arrested with your wiener hanging out, so don't do it. No butts, either; Just make it easy on yourself and keep your pants on. Ladies, respect this law too unless you want a Lewd Conduct charge sitting on your record.
DO NOT openly do drugs. This should be a no-brainer, but it seems every year I see someone getting arrested for this. Don't think that being allowed to drink in the streets means you can smoke weed in the open, snort cocaine off trash cans, or pop pills in an alley (and yes, I've seen it all happen before). There are plenty of undercover cops walking the streets masked as common folk, so it's nearly impossible to get away with this. Besides, Mardi Gras should give you all the high you need.
DO NOT bother cars and taxis trying to cross Bourbon. No matter how stupid you think someone is for attempting to drive across Bourbon street during Mardi Gras, keep your hands off their car as they slowly drive by. Drunks -- young men usually -- think it's funny to give the driver a hard time by slapping their hands on the hood or rocking the car back and forth as it creeps through the crowd. It's not funny, and you'll be arrested for doing it. This is one of the dumbest things you can do, because cops usually hang out at intersections and will throw you on the ground and arrest you faster than you can say, "happy Mardi Gras!"
DO NOT get in a fight. If there's one thing NOPD are looking out for, it's fighting. And New Orleans's finest are like ninjas when it comes to breaking up fights; I've seen two guys going at it in what seems like a crowd of millions when, out of nowhere, a posse of cops swoop in and break up the fight within seconds. It's amazing, really. They don't care who punched who first, who spilled whose drink, who ogled whose girlfriend's breasts -- if you're involved in a fight, you'll be arrested. If in the unfortunate event you make someone mad, apologize profusely and leave the area, alerting the nearest police officer of the situation. It might not be the manliest thing you can do, but ask yourself this: would you rather spend Mardi Gras having fun, or in jail?
DO NOT touch the pretty horse. NOPD uses mounted police for crowd control. No matter how cute or friendly the horse looks, keep your hands off the animal unless you ask the cop nicely first and they give you permission. Think it'd be funny to slap the horse's ass? Think again! How does "assault on an officer" sound? Not good. In fact, if you see a cop on a horse on Bourbon and it's not midnight on Fat Tuesday, it's best to keep your distance. Chances are they're about to spin that horse around to clear a crowd, and you don't want to be caught in the middle.
That said, New Orleans -- especially during Mardi Gras -- is relaxed and fun. Leave your ego in the hotel room, respect the city, be safe, and have fun. And when you see NOPD, politely thank them for the job they're doing. Many of them are working overtime to keep you safe.
Happy Mardi Gras!
Filed under: Festivals and Events, United States
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Reader Comments (Page 1 of 1)
Sally Jan 29th 2008 12:44PM
Duh! These actions are not only illegal at the Mardi Gras, but all over the world. This isn't the law, this is scruples and common sense. What kind of lowlife would pee in the streets.....jeeeeeeesh
elaine Jan 30th 2008 12:51AM
you have never SMELLED the French Quarter at Mardi Garas or you would know that a lot of people pee in the street. The FREE public toilets over flow and get RANK very fast. Some very smart people set up Portable potties and charge $2 or $3 per use. The streetis free.
Justin Glow Jan 30th 2008 1:06AM
Like I said in the article, just because a lot of people do it doesn't make it right. Peeing in the streets is disrespectful and illegal. Don't do it.
valerie Jan 29th 2008 2:14PM
I've never been to Mardi Gras. PARTS of it sound really fun!!!
elaine Jan 30th 2008 1:00AM
Mardi Gras can be a trip of a life time. Parades, Throws, costumes. The food. But why pay thousands of dollars for airfare and hotels then getting so drunk you don't remember a think about it? Or worse doing something stupid and going to jail. If you go to jail between Friday and Tuesday , Mardi Gras Day there is no arraignment until Wednesday morning. So you miss it all, and if you have to catch a plane or had a ride to catch you are out of luck.
CRB Jan 31st 2008 9:52AM
ALSO, DON'T CLIMB ON THE LAMP POSTS...BIG NO-NO.
Justin Glow Jan 31st 2008 9:59AM
Another good one, CRB. They even grease the poles to make them harder to climb up.
CRB Jan 31st 2008 9:57AM
MARDI GRAS IN N.O. IS NASTY AND DANGEROUS. TRY GOING TO MOBILE, AL. SAFE, CLEAN, FUN -- AND MOBILE IS THE REAL BIRTH-PLACE OF MARDI GRAS.
Karen Feb 3rd 2008 1:35PM
Lafayette, LA also has a great Mardi Gras. It's really fun, safe and family oriented with lots of great beads! Parades start 2 weekends before Fat Tuesday and finish with almost nonstop floats rolling on Mardi Gras day. Almost every small town surrounding the city also has some really good parades as well as a Boucherie and some fais do do! On Saturday before, you can catch a children's parade in Lafayette, choose between a parade in Carencro or Youngsville and be back in Lafayette for the night time parade. All in one day! The people are nicer and the food is much better than in New Orleans! You're really in the heart of Cajun country here.
Mary Feb 1st 2008 11:56AM
Great article! As a born & raised New Orleanian it never fails to amaze me how these tourists come in and think it's a free-for-all @ during Mardi Gras. Yes, the TOURISTS....native New Orleanians know how to act here, because we live this way every day. Walking around with an open container is no big deal. I personally do not know any girl who has flashed; it is almost always tourists acting that way. CRB, if you are looking for nasty and dangerous then you will find it anywhere, not just in New Orleans. There is more to Mardi Gras than Bourbon Street. Growing up in New Orleans my family hung out in Metairie or on St. Charles Ave., where it is safe, clean and fun. I've been to Bourbon St. only 2 times during Mardi Gras, and that is because there is so much more to do throughout the entire city, and my idea of a fun time is not hanging out with the tourists who come and go crazy, can't hold their liquor, don't know how to act, get into fights, piss and puke everywhere. That generally goes on around Bourbon St. The nastiness is almost always because of the tourists. Don't get me wrong they are more than welcome in New Orleans, but it irks me when people try to give New Orleans a bad name because of the actions of people that don't even live here. I love Mardi Gras! It is the start of my most favorite time of year! Once again great article...don't do any of that stuff and you'll be fine.
alloverem Feb 1st 2008 2:48PM
I agree with Mary. I'm also a native, and I see much more misbehavior from out of towners than from locals. Come on down, have fun but please leave any type of attitude, other than having a great laid-back time, at home! I also agree that most folks outside of the city are unaware there are two Mardi Gras's. If you're in the Quarter, it's R rated and pretty rowdy. But if you spend any time outside of the Quarter and in the residential areas along the parade routes, it's very G rated and family-oriented. It's basically a big neighborhood picnic or block party for the most part. I only bring visitors to the Quarter if they specifically ask me, and even then I try to talk them out of it. There is so much more to Mardi Gras than what you see in the mass media or on certain video productions offered on late-night TV.
tit Feb 5th 2008 5:23PM
Please. Mobile, AL is one of the lamest places to be during the Mardi Gras season. And any other time. The birthplace of Mardi Gras? That's Brazil's "Carnivale." Being going on much, much longer.