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The Southwest Airlines Stripper Plane
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Every Friday evening, some time before most people have clocked out of work and begin heading home for the weekend, a plane takes off from LAX. Like so many other flights at this time, this one is also heading to Las Vegas. It's not full of gamblers, however, but rather a disproportionate amount of silicone that bounces and jiggles through the warm, desert-air turbulence all the way to Vegas where, for the remainder of Friday and Saturday night, it will continue quivering away at $20 a pop.
This, folks, is the Southwest Stripper Plane.
The passengers are LA's greatest temporary export, heading off for a weekend of singles and 20s to help baby pay the rent. They are blessed with the sun-kissed glory of Southern California and enhanced by the world's greatest plastic surgeons, and of course every single one is a struggling teacher, college student, or some other admirable profession that will keep suckers reaching into their wallet time after time to help out their worthy cause, whatever it might be.
No one really knows what time this legendary, perhaps even mythical flight leaves Los Angeles. Seats are reserved months in advance and few mere mortals are able to secure a reservation. A friend of mine claims he once found himself on this flight but can't seem to remember the details, as though some powerful force scrubbed his brain clean, leaving only a trace of glitter on his sweaty forehead.
Others less fortunate can only dream that the planets align one day and that they find themselves sitting on a plane in Los Angeles watching their fellow passengers squeeze their gigantic moneymakers into Southwest's cramped economy seats. If there was ever a time for long delays or a casualty-free crash on a desert island, this would certainly be it.
Remember Kyla Ebbert, the girl Southwest imposed a dress code on?
Gallery: Kyla Ebbert in Pictures
Filed under: Airlines
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Reader Comments (Page 1 of 3)
jock Jan 16th 2008 1:37PM
Wow! What's your pastime to be able to recall all of that!! Jus' kidding!!
sitruc Jan 16th 2008 2:49PM
Neil, have you ever met a woman who is a stripper or sat down in a strip club or are you just basing things on what you have seen on television and in the movies?
mallthus Jan 16th 2008 2:50PM
This is no myth...most of the Friday mid-day and afternoon flights from LAX, SNA and BUR are lousy with them.
Note however, that not all of them are strippers and it's not just Southwest. In fact, Jet Blue's getting a lot of "ladies" flying out of Long Beach. ("They have TV!")
Some are just trashy SoCal party girls, while others are engaged in much older profession.
Here are some good bets (as of January 2008):
BUR-LAS
WN 446 1:55pm
WN 61 2:40pm
WN 3331 4:10pm
LAX-LAS
US 888 2:00pm
WN 444 3:00pm
WN 2732 3:40pm
US 2845 3:40pm
UA 1527 4:00pm
WN 1019 4:25pm
LGB-LAS
F9 194 1:30pm
F9 284 4:30pm
SNA-LAS
US 321 1:55pm
WN 1363 3:05pm
Carmen Jan 16th 2008 4:03PM
I suppose if you really like rock-hard, plastic tits this might seem like a dream come true. Seems more like a nightmare to me.
ANTHONY Jul 10th 2008 5:06PM
hEY dUDE i AGREE i WANT THAT FLIGHT ASAP INEED TO FLY AROUND AND SEE THOSE HOT BABES IN BMY FACE TOO PLUS NO CHARGE TO TALK AND CHECK OUT THE LADIES FROM THE WEST COAST YOU GO
steve Oct 6th 2008 1:15AM
Spoken like a woman without fake tits....
Bill Reals Jan 16th 2008 5:16PM
It's also on flights from San Diego to Las Vegas on Firdays. Sunday late afternoon is eye candy central at the Las Vegas Airport
Jack Jan 16th 2008 7:40PM
Not a myth.
Flown that flight many times.
The thursday before Superbowl weekend is the best.
The higher $$ gals all split a private charter flight.
The Southwest flights are mostly for your bread and butter, coach class hooker/strippers.
And a lot of them travel with their very butch looking girlfriends.
sitruc Jan 16th 2008 11:12PM
Did a couple of posts get deleted or something?
tricky Jan 17th 2008 12:55PM
wow i need a ticket
stew Jan 17th 2008 2:08PM
when do these flights start going from the east coast???
Chloe Jan 17th 2008 2:15PM
Disgusting and just plain morally wrong. Not only are the women to blame for being trashy, but so are the men that pay to get on these flights. For shame.
Doug Jan 17th 2008 2:18PM
I was on a SW flight last February, when a cute little dark skinned, big boobed baby doll sat beside me...we got talking, and about 45 minutes into the discussion....her (butch girl friend) comes over and asks me if I would trade seats with her....!!!! long story short, I swapped because I didn't want to be in an altercation...and I would have probably gotten my ass beat...I'm 6'0 and weight 180...the butch had me outgunned !!!
John Doe Jan 17th 2008 2:43PM
I dont believe, even in my naivety (sp) that all those butch girls are girlfriends. Alot of hookers (eh ehm) escorts have a protector with them to hold thier money and help them out of dicey situations or to keep guys in check. At least thats what I heard....yeah, thats it.
Julia Jan 17th 2008 2:54PM
HMMMMMM, NOW THATS ENTERTAINMENT!!!!!
Jamie Jan 17th 2008 2:58PM
Not just Superbowl weekend, but any weekend that there's a big convention in town (Las Vegas), which is often. The higher end clubs hire on extra dancers that fly in to meet demand. Demand is high in a town where there's a VIP bowling alley section in one hotel that has strippers wandering through the bowling alley during TUESDAY night league. Seriously.
Bama Jan 17th 2008 3:01PM
BEEN THERE ... DONE THAT
Thomas Jan 17th 2008 3:01PM
My girl-friend "dances" in Vegas and can you blame her? She makes an average of $1200 a night and during conventions $2500 a night CASH. Security is really tight, the men on a whole behave themselves and most of them just want to talk to a pretty girl, half the time she doesn't take off her top, she just sits there half asleep listening to a drunk guy half asleep also!
Big Al May 20th 2008 9:01PM
You are you tring to kid I run one of these places for fifteen years and seen it all . Stop the BULL S---.. Get real she wont be around for long,Bye Sucka...
myty Jan 17th 2008 3:56PM
BOYS REMEMBER TO KEEP PLAYING WITH YOUR TINY TINY TOYS!!!!!! GET INTO THE REAL WORLD!!!!! AND KEEP DREAMING BOYYYYYYYYSSSSSSSS