Big in Japan: Crazy Japanese News Stories That’ll Blow Your Mind

The following list of news stories was complied by Metropolis, a weekly Japan-based English magazine.

Think there are some bizarre news stories splashing across the US headlines as of recent? Wait until you read about all the crazy stuff that happened in Japan this week.

A homeless woman arrested for stealing bread in Numazu escaped from custody when the cop interrogating her dozed off. The woman fled on a stolen bicycle before being apprehended about a mile and a half away.

It was revealed that the Aichi government paid 34,000 yen (US$300) in compensation to an 8 year-old girl who was hit in the head with a stone thrown by a chimpanzee at a local zoo.

According to a survey conducted by the Health, Labor and Welfare ministry, Tokyo is home to an estimated 5,400 ‘net café refugees’ or people with no fixed address who spend their nights living in internet cafes.

A researcher at the National Institute for Japanese Language has concluded that the frequency of English lyrics in Japanese pop songs has plummeted because “the freshness symbolized by foreign words seems to be declining.”

Perhaps in response, a governmental advisory body suggested that primary schools add English instruction to their roster of subjects.

It was reported that a 62 year-old man from Tochigi Prefecture was arrested for beating his 89 year-old mother in the head for not finishing all of her breakfast.

It was reported that as many as 1,100 people lined up in Yebisu Garden Place in Tokyo for the opening of Tokyo’s first McCafe, an upscale eatery from McDonald’s that specializes in light meals. There are currently 15 McCafes throughout Japan.

Three death row inmates were hung on the same day, the third time since Christmas that Japan has executed multiple prisoners on a single day.

A 54 year-old man from Okayama Prefecture, upset over Prime Minister Shinzo Abe’s decision not to visit Yasukuni Shrine last month, severed his pinky and sent it to the government headquarters in Tokyo, along with a DVD recording the dismemberment.

The number of fake brand goods seized by police in the first six months of 2007 – 331,136 – exceeded the number confiscated in all of 2006.

It was revealed that for the second year in a row, Abashiri Prison in Hokkaido was fighting an infestation of marijuana plants. The officials were alerted to the presence of the evil weed, which sprouted up in the exercise ground, by snitches among the prison population.

Coleman Japan has come up with a portable shower powered by four AA batteries that is capable of pumping out 20 liters of water. The device costs just 3,780 yen (US$32).

A special session at the UN’s Conference on the Standardization of Geographical Names concluded that the Sea of Japan should not be renamed, much to the consternation of both North and South Korea.

And finally…

A Nagano organization called the Omachi Digger Wasp Lovers Group persuaded a local rice cracker maker to create a snack that contains their beloved insect as the main ingredient. A bag of digger wasp crackers cost 370 yen (US$3.50) for a bag of 20.

I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again – Japan is a weird, wacky and wonderful place.