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10 Drinks Men Should Not Order
I'm always a little dubious when someone deigns to tell me what is and what is NOT allowed when it comes to male behavior. I occasionally read magazines like Details and when I come to the "Clothes a man should never wear" articles, I always find a few things from my own closet right there on the page. Keeping up with what's in style costs too damn much money. Besides, yesterday's faux pas is today's hip new thing. But I do have to agree somewhat with a few of the drinks listed in this fun slide show admonishing males over what should NOT be ordered and consumed among alcoholic beverages.
To wit: anything blended, unless you're on the beach. In other words, fruity drinks with little umbrellas or massive hunks of fruit tipping off of them: a no-no. I buy this. Sugary drinks like Mai Tais are just not very masculine. You're not having dessert for goodness sakes, you're getting hammered with friends! Beer is bitter and wine is sour and scotch packs a punch for a reason. You're supposed to suffer just a small amount for the sinful indulgence of drinking them.
If it's all sugary and yum-yum, you'll drink all the time. And you'll not only become a drunkard, you'll be a fat drunkard from all that sugar. Or so goes my own concocted explanation for why I don't order sugary drinks. Alas, you may find a Pina Colada nice and fulfilling. So go ahead and order one. And have a nice little plate of quiche while you're at it.
Filed under: Food and Drink
Reader Comments (Page 4 of 18)
Erla Mae Aug 8th 2007 10:15AM
blah blah-- the worlds at war and they are worried about drinks and clothes?? go for it guys!!
Black Widow Aug 8th 2007 10:16AM
Good Lord! Lighten up, people! Especially you, C.C.S. It's a witty little blog meant to entertain, not the be-all and end-all of what makes a man. Try a little humor, and YOU might just find out that life can be fun!
Doug Aug 8th 2007 10:17AM
What an ignorant article.
Christine Aug 8th 2007 10:18AM
*cheers at Black Widow*
GregS96 Aug 8th 2007 10:23AM
A "real man" wears and drinks whatever he wants, when he wants. A "real man" also is not one to cast inappropriate attention to himself or endorse crude or rude behavior. Finally, "real man" is a Christian/American gentleman who, by definition, means what he says and says what he means, and treats others the way he would want to be treated.
jud5w Aug 8th 2007 10:23AM
Men w/umbrella drinks and white blazers w/shirts unnuttoned with a tropical atmosphere is top notch and sexy at its hottest. ! Think again. I think men that would refuse to think other wise have only shown how weak they are. Heavy set men are not sexy. Fix that. Health, a little muscle, tone and any kind of drink they want!:)
only1mia Aug 8th 2007 10:25AM
A REAL mai tai is NOT fruity. If you have ever been to Hawaii and had a REAL one, you would know. They are strong!
Chuck Aug 8th 2007 10:25AM
I think its a good article.
Nothing worse than when some big hot bubba orders some foo-foo drink. And I'm GAY.
Guys definitely lose points for foo-foo drinks or if they holed their beer bottles above their stomach.
Girly men, aka metrosexual men, are a turn off.
Hair product, foo-foo drinks, and voting for liberals are definite point losers in my book.
NRH Aug 8th 2007 10:35AM
I spent most of my working life outside the US, much of it in former British colonies where pink gin, gin and tonic and scotch and soda were the usual hard drinks. Pim's cup, beer and at meals, wine, were also drank at appropriate times and settings.
Sweet alcoholic drinks were not in vogue at that time except among Americans. Any man that bellied up to the bar in a club and ordered something other than the three listed initially, would have been looked at with curiosity. Otherwise, like the person who wrote the piece above, I beleve that sweet alcoholic drinks lure one into drinking more of them that he might otherwise if he sticks to the old fashion libations. Interestingly, the American obsession with what is manly and less manly is pecular only to American males. Most other men simply do what men do and wear what men wear and don't give a thought to whether it is manly or not.
To my thinking and foreigners also note this, the fixation of American men with their gender is very odd. Most men elsewhere on the planet take their maleness for granted and don't feel compelled to to prove it with every choice they make during the day.
Chuck Aug 8th 2007 10:36AM
case in point...
one of the "guys" defending wearing pink and drinking frilly foo-foo drinks is named "BOBO!"
the guy probably knits sweaters for his french poodle.
if the guy is indeed married, his wife must wear the pants in that fun little family. She clearly is threatened by masculine men.
deb Aug 8th 2007 10:37AM
Gosh.. this is the dumbest articla I've read so far!
REAL MEN, can drink anything they want and wear anything they want!
sambo Aug 8th 2007 10:49AM
I can't believe the author of this 'study' would waste his time preparing such homophobic shit.
He went to school just to produce this type of 'journalism?' Looks to me like a high school project gone bad........
Ms. K Aug 8th 2007 10:44AM
Hmmmm...whose lips would I rather taste? A man who drank a mai tai or a beer? Besides...drunk is drunk. The bouncer that throws you out of a club could care less if you grabbed that waitress' fanny under the influence of a scotch or a Long Island Iced Tea.
kaleena Aug 8th 2007 10:57AM
apparently some ppl really do believe there is a difference between manly drinks and girly drinks. I was recently at a chinese restaurant and my mom and dad both ordered mai tais. When the waiter came out to give them their drinks, my mom went to take it from his hand and he said no, this is the man mai tai, and gave it to my dad. After tasting them, we figured out that the "man mai tai" had more alcohol in it than the woman's mai tai (although they were charged the same price!) The next time they ordered, my mom made sure to specify that she wanted a MAN mai tai. ha!
calicarson Aug 8th 2007 10:52AM
I like what are considered "girly drinks", but I have yet have one guy come up and call me a wimp. I have been just waiting for some a**hole to say anything, that way you can be shown the drink don't make the man...lol
The Masked Rye Aug 8th 2007 10:58AM
I never liked beer and I don't drink wine. I'll drink shots, but when I'm out and not planning on getting hammered, I order Shirley Temples. I always ordered them as a kid, and so one day I realized there was no real reason to stop drinking them. You know you love them. I'm 32 and still drinking them. If it comes down to serious drinking, I'll be having rum or tequila, but otherwise I'll be drinking Shirley Temples. It's never hampered my "game" at all.
Let's just clarify the pink though. Wear pink, sure. But if you wear too much of it (shirt, pants, shoes) you're bound to look like a fool, no matter how confident you are. It's not about looking "gay". It's about plain bad taste.
michele Aug 8th 2007 11:10AM
You've got to be joking? Erik it's apparent that you have way too much time on your hands. Do you actually get paid for this? If so I think I need a new job.
To you guys, drink whatever you want wear pink. 99% of the women aren't going to judge you by what you drink or the color of your shirt!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Clint Aug 8th 2007 11:28AM
Well I kind of agree with what the guy who wrote the article has to say. As a bartender, it pains me when I see a man order a glass of white zinfandel. There's nothing wrong with a fruity drink every now and then, but I believe in beer. And seeing a man drink something topped with tons of fruit garnish and whipped topping through a straw is a little emasculating.
Mike Aug 8th 2007 11:22AM
I'll stick with me Irish, thank you. Up The Republic!
Tom Aug 9th 2007 6:56PM
I will stick to my Tequlia, Quervo I like best, I drink for effect. If you want a fruity drink have at it. Just have fun lifes to short to worry about what someones drinking, much less wearing. go party with friends have fun.