Oh, the Amazing Race never seems to fail. If you haven’t seen the second episode and aren’t interested in hearing any spoilers, please stop reading now. Otherwise, let’s go!
Last week we left the All-Star Amazing Racers (minus one team) in Quito, Ecuador, where the 1st pit-stop was from the premiere episode. The episode begins with Drew — the same guy who tripped and fell on the concrete in some sort of bizarre, uh, falling accident — experiencing altitude sickness and in need of bottled oxygen in order to continue. This isn’t the last we hear of Drew and his ailments (sounds like a band name, doesn’t it?), as he survives to continue the race, but not without whining like a little girl at every bump in the road. Literally.
Receiving their next clue, Racers head to the airport to catch a plane to Santiago, Chile, home of Codelco’s Corporate Headquarters. Like the thugs that they are, Kevin and Drew play flight attendant by yanking Kentucky’s luggage out of a first-class overhead bin because they were sitting coach. Acting in a complete opposite manner, life partners Joe and Bill rustle up some cucumber slices and place them over their eyes to reduce the swelling caused by jet lag, I guess. Tell me: you’re on a race around the world — where do you find the time to secure cucumbers, and how do you slice them? What they probably didn’t show is Joe and Bill harassing a Subway sandwich artist for a baggy of leftover, complexion-cleansing vegetables and a Cold Cut Trio.
Codelco is the world’s largest copper producer, and it is in their corporate offices where, after landing in Santiago, the racers have their next roadblock. This seemed quite confusing at first: the task was to find random letters around a boardroom and unscramble them into location names noted underneath 10 pictures on the office walls. Who comes up with this stuff? A boardroom? That’s exactly what it was like in my house while watching: a board room. RIMSHOT! A few of the teams were smart enough (Kentucky?!) to do the challenge in reverse by writing all the location names down and working backwards from the letters they found. This proved to be much quicker, and allowed several teams to leave the not-so-bright in the dust. But still…who cares? They’re going to have to really pick things up to hold my interest here.
The letters, once unscrambled, spelled out their next destination: Chuquicamata, the largest open pit copper mine in the world located in Calama, Chile. And so it was — the teams hopped another flight towards Calama and once they landed and found the copper mine, they were ready for the Detour: By hand or By machine. In by hand, teams had to tighten some lug nuts or screws on a giant machine wheel. In by machine, each team member had to separately operate a front-loader and use it to dump some dirt. Thrilling stuff here, folks. Really.
After finishing the task, teams could now head to the location of the next pit stop: The Valley of the Dead, in the Valley of the Moon, in the Valley of the Doorknob, over the Valley of the Helpmegodthisisboring. The only notable thing happening is Charla and Mirna’s altercation with a taxi driver over the cost of a following fare. “Just take all my money!” yelled Mirna, thrusting her purse (or was it the race fanny pack?) into the arms of the driver. I’m surprised she didn’t rip off all of her clothes, hand over the keys to the truck she was driving, and break out her will to sign all of her worldly possessions over to this poor taxi driver who just wanted his money so he could be on his way. “Amigo!”
Ramber once again finish first, which isn’t surprising since they seem to be the only team really racing the way this race should be raced. NY thugs arrive last, but not without Drew using every excuse in the book. “I tried my hardest,” he told Phil at the loser’s mat, which was quickly followed up with a complaint about a sore driving foot. What? Come on, dude. You hurt your foot while driving? Sorry, but I’m glad you’re gone.
Catch us next Monday for another recap of the Amazing Race: All-Stars!