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Florida's Multiple Personalities
Look, I'm going to be honest here. I'm not a big fan of Florida. I know lots of good folks live there and there are likely lots of good places to see I've never been, but the fact remains I have been to many of Florida's alleged "hot spots" and I have found them wanting. I spent a week in the Keys several years ago (cheesy!), I spent some days in Miami (scary!), and then of course, I've made a requisite visit to Orlando (the horror!) to visit Disney World. Please, help me out. What am I missing? OK, I am being unduly harsh. This fact became rather more obvious once I read this piece over at New York Magazine about Florida's many different personalities. It seems there's ample history, fishing, food, sports, outdoors activities and so on in the orange juice state. Pretty much everything a gadling reader could ever want.
Did I mention the kitsch? I said cheesiness, which is kind of the same thing. Kitsch is sort of intentional cheesiness. New Yorkers love kitsch, so perhaps that why they called out the "unapologetically tiki-tacky Mai-Kai bar," whatever that is (although judging from the picture, it doesn't look half bad). I'll bet it is absolutely great after about 16 drinks.
Anyway, to all you Floridians out there: I'm sorry if you feel hurt. I know I need to spend more time in your state. Someday I will. Maybe.
Filed under: Arts and Culture, History, Learning, North America, United States, Hotels and Accommodations








Reader Comments (Page 1 of 2)
R. Maehrlein Oct 14th 2006 8:20PM
In complete agreement with you on this sentiment! (:
owen Oct 14th 2006 9:22PM
please do us a favor do not visit Fl. we dont want you.
Jack Oct 14th 2006 9:30PM
florida rules
Jennifer Oct 14th 2006 9:30PM
The most kitsch location in all of America is Branson, Missouri. Hands down. Florida is high culture in comparison.
M Oct 14th 2006 9:31PM
I lived in Miami for a little over a year. Although Florida is a truly be autiful place, it was a trashy hell hole and I will NEVER go back again.
Kelly Householder Oct 14th 2006 9:32PM
Let me be clear - I get what you are saying about the Keys, Miami and 0rlando! As a Floridian - not native but resident for 20+ years - I have found all those locales lacking as well. Let me suggest a few places off the beaten trail. Sanibel Island - my favorite place of all - is a beautiful island with fabulous beachs, shelling and wildlife. It is not known for it nightlife but by day you will find many bicyclists, walkers & beachcombers enjoying the laid back pace. The panhandle boasts some of the most beautiful beaches in our state but also some of the fullest hotels. If you move just a little east of Destin - you will find a wonderful little town of Seaside. If camping is your thing - try Grayton Beach Florida State Park. Tampa's nightlife areas give any of those "big" cities a run for their money. Check out Channelside with it's mix of eateries, clubs and even an uptown, chic bowling alley that serves sushi. If you want History - Ybor City is teaming with awesome restaurants, dance clubs and some of the finest hand rolled cigars you can find. Before you rule out Florida completely - try some places NOT in the travel magazines.
Clark Oct 26th 2006 11:03PM
try st. pete/clearwater. real FL
Lizette Oct 14th 2006 9:42PM
i Florida has many amazing locations. You just can't go by some tourist guide. As another person commented, Sanibel is beautiful and full of wildlife and beautiful beaches.The Keyes are beautiful but you have to go to a nice resort like Hawks Cay and it helps if you have a boat. Miami Is not for everyone and you don't sound like someone that would enjoy the diverse culture, beautiful people and delicious food that Miami has to offer.
Monique Oct 14th 2006 10:02PM
I am a Florida native, and I have never liked it here. I find it refreshingly funny to hear that not all tourists think it's the most perfect place in the world. I get so tired of people calling it a "paradise." Yeah, Florida is pretty and all, but it definitely can get boring, just like anywhere else. And the hot weather gets old very fast. But I do agree with Kelly's comment about Tampa and Ybor City. Channelside and Tampa in general are great, fun places to visit. I've only ever spent one day in Miami, but I didn't particularly like it there, either. It's like being in a foreign country- everything is in Spanish! And the roads are insane, with one overpass on top of another. In general, Florida can be a nice place to visit if you go to the right places, but believe me: you wouldn't want to live here!
Michael B. Arnold Oct 14th 2006 10:24PM
You can find cheesiness and kitsch anywhere you go. It's usually imported from elsewhere by people who've fouled their own nest elsewhere.
J. Wilkins Oct 15th 2006 8:53AM
As a Floridian for the past 21 years and now also a part time resident of VA and having traveled to every state except Hawaii... you need to get off the beaten path to see the real beauty of Florida. It has a beauty you won't find anywhere else if you will just look and the winters are like living in Paradise...the summers like Hell! so if you want to move there...don't ...unless you keep a place in the north for the summers.
As to kitch...Branson is nothing compared to Pigeon Forge, TN. and if you travel you will find kitch in every state...I have been a resident of TN and it is one of my favorite states but ...those places are there and you need to get away from those places to find the real beauty....usually close by...such as the beautiful Smokie Mountain National Park...but drive a little further to another kitch place and you will be in Cherokee!! and so it goes no matter what state and I can continue to about every state!!!
david a galler Oct 15th 2006 3:44PM
Talk about what is or to what degree something is kitch is totally useless!
Melissa Oct 14th 2006 10:23PM
I think the bugs (size and amount) are the most impressive feature in Florida! I never fail to come home without a bug story. There's the time I discovered fireants, there's the time I was bit by a spider. (While staying at a very expensive home in an exclusive section of Destin! The bite still swells during allergy season......six years later!) Cockroaches the size mice! You could put a saddle on one and ride it!
Michael Oct 15th 2006 8:49AM
So you're telling me you went to the places listed by AAA and you're not satisfied, kind of like going to New York, seeing the Empire State Building, Nathan's Famous and the Statue of Liberty and saying I just don't get it. Not a problem, we like tourists like you, you come and spend money in places we set aside for you and then leave with no desire to move here. Mission accomplished.
HENK MEYER Oct 14th 2006 10:54PM
Florida--love it or leave it!!! For my part...I'll take the sunshine and some "chessy" over freezing in Buffalo!!
Phuket Real Estate Oct 14th 2006 11:07PM
I've spent time in Florida and I think it's a great state. Expand your horizons and make sure to take in Phuket, Thailand in your travels. It's like Florida as far as the weather goes (except no hurricanes)but you can live here on a fraction of the price.
Karl Petry Oct 14th 2006 11:18PM
You're 100% right! Intense heat, BUGS and retired people who forgot how to drive. Lets not forget the airport and city of Orlando dominated by the logo of a rodent named "Micky Mouse."
Margaret T. Oct 14th 2006 11:20PM
I've lived up and down the east coast, and traveled extensively in the US. Where did my husband and I decide to live in retirement? Central Florida. We've seen the rest and like Florida best. Our area is so much like the mid-atlantic states that it's hard to believe, we just don't get the autumn color in fall, or tulips in the spring, and we have some palm trees. We also don't get 2" of snow in October -- or any other month. We've lived in a lot of 'northern' places that get a lot hotter than Florida in the summer. (Try Texas and St. Louis,too) Summer just lasts from May to October here.We welcome the snowbirds and tourists, too, in spite of their rude remarks about our heat, bugs and kitsch. They pay enough in consumer taxes that we don't have state income tax. So come to visit, any time of the year, then go home and leave us in peace.
Richard Oct 14th 2006 11:32PM
I visited Florida twice in the past five years and to tell you the honest truth, I went there especially in search of the kitsch. I live in Los Angeles - near Universal Studios and Hollywood. I KNOW KITSCH. What I think you are missing here is that in this modern age of Computer Generated Imagery and laser effects, that we have lost the ability to appreciate the innocence of an earlier generation which many Florida tourist attractions still, thankfully, offer.
I feel grateful to have experienced Cypress Gardens before they closed. I didn't make it to Wikki Wakki Gardens, but would have loved to. I only hope that for every person who has had the misfortune to have been injured on a state-of-the-art roller coaster or thrill ride there is another, like me, who is thrilled at Gator farms and the Fountain of Youth in St. Augustine. I went to Orlando and saw the sites there, and it was no different than CA. With both kinds of attractions available, Florida is a great vacation destination.
Susan Reis Oct 14th 2006 11:49PM
We are Florida residents for 30 years now. Right across the street from us is Wekiva Springs State Pk. Rent a canoe and do River Run there...especially in the fall...you'll be totally alone for 5 miles and see birds and wildlife that will keep you gawking. and, guaranteed no kitch! And we are only 35 minutes from WDW.